Internship Diary: Making the Most of Each Moment

Photography by Kylie McNutt

Walking through the glass door to PATTERN, I would have never guessed my internship experience would have ended the way it did. 

When I received the email confirming my interview at PATTERN, I thought it was too good to be true. After far too many hours spent crafting the *perfect* cover letter and fantasizing over what this experience could look like for me, I had gotten the email I wanted the most. As a college student looking for a marketing and PR internship in the fashion-realm, PATTERN was the one position I wanted the most. These feelings were confirmed when I walked through the doors- the creative atmosphere welcomed me in, even with all of my nerves. 

During the interview itself, my excitement became overwhelmed by nerves- in one of the hundred ‘Intern Diaries’ I had read, I had noted that the interview would be in a group, but it’s a far different experience thinking about walking into a group interview than actually participating in one. Looking around the table at the three other potential interns who seemed to have much greater and more experiences than my own, I was sure my chances were shot.

Things really became too good to be true when I received the email which read “Welcome to PATTERN!” I could not believe it, and honestly did not. I kept reading and re-reading the email until I had it memorized, pinning it to the top of my inbox to read it again whenever I had the chance. I waited to tell my parents, convincing myself I was accidentally sent the email. At one point, I went back to my inbox to read the email for what must have been the 400th time and couldn’t find it. My heart sank. “They must have unsent it and realized they made a mistake.” Well, luckily for me, not only is that not possible, but I completely forgot I had pinned it to the top of my inbox, pulling it out of the swarm of other received emails (not my proudest moment). 

When I first began my position at PATTERN, I was convinced that every good thing I had achieved was purely luck. Coming out of PATTERN, I have built the confidence to know that, now, I have earned my successes. PATTERN has given me the independence and ambition to follow my passions and pursue those opportunities outside of my comfort zone, building a confidence in me I didn’t know I was capable of having.

But of course, things really did become too good to be true when I received the email, which read “I have a feeling we’re unlikely to meet in the same space before the end of your internship.” Despite having 3.5 months of great experiences and memories with fellow interns turned close friends, I didn’t- and still don’t- feel like my time should be up, or that I’m anywhere near finished. I am forever grateful for the memories and opportunities I have had at PATTERN, but I wish I could have been able to fully savor one last time at the studio and have one last laugh with the people who made this experience so much sweeter. 

While this time of mass quarantining and social distancing could never have been predicted, I have learned, and hope others have too, to take no moment for granted. Make the most of each second doing what you love, because you never know when that thing could come to an abrupt end.